Dear Ken,
It's a small improvement, but I'm making progress!
#That'sAll
14 November 2010
13 November 2010
Hours wasted?
Dear Ken,
I hate being a procrastinator!
Waking up extra early (8 a-m) on a weekend, I had this perfect outline of how the day would go. What have I accomplished? Not a damn thing! It's now 2:56, and there is so much to get done. Should I skip the gym? Heck no! Should I be sitting here on blogger.com writing an entry? #iLaugh
Well, this day hasn't been all that unproductive. I was able to complete some major research for an upcoming presentation. Also, I was able to get about a page of the book written! So, yay me!!
#GymTime
On a s/n, I have been playing this song all morning ...
I hate being a procrastinator!
Waking up extra early (8 a-m) on a weekend, I had this perfect outline of how the day would go. What have I accomplished? Not a damn thing! It's now 2:56, and there is so much to get done. Should I skip the gym? Heck no! Should I be sitting here on blogger.com writing an entry? #iLaugh
Well, this day hasn't been all that unproductive. I was able to complete some major research for an upcoming presentation. Also, I was able to get about a page of the book written! So, yay me!!
#GymTime
On a s/n, I have been playing this song all morning ...
11 November 2010
Dying daily!
Dear Ken,
I love having random moments.
Yesterday, a coworker and I were talking about something. Honestly, I can't even recall what the topic of conversation was about. However, in the midst of her speaking, she unintentionally gave me a wonderful reminder. In our 15-minute conversation, the only words I remember are: I die to sin daily. At that moment, I had a light bulb moment. It hit me. No matter how perfect I strive to be, I have to crucify the flesh on a continual basis.
#DearCoworker, Thank you for the reminder! #That'sAll
I love having random moments.
Yesterday, a coworker and I were talking about something. Honestly, I can't even recall what the topic of conversation was about. However, in the midst of her speaking, she unintentionally gave me a wonderful reminder. In our 15-minute conversation, the only words I remember are: I die to sin daily. At that moment, I had a light bulb moment. It hit me. No matter how perfect I strive to be, I have to crucify the flesh on a continual basis.
#DearCoworker, Thank you for the reminder! #That'sAll
08 November 2010
Of two minds
Dear Ken,
Today is one of those days. Lately, when I have been feeling some kind of way, I have refrained from writing about it. It is refreshing to remember how writing makes everything seems so peaceful and calm. Thankfully, nothing too major is happening; my drive and passion has just been temporarily exhausted. In moments like this, I have to pause and contemplate the next phases in my life. It is amazing and, yet, bittersweet to have awakening opportunities. The growing pains - not so much.
Looking back on life, I am overwhelmed with excitement of how each obstacle has built upon the next. During the period of uncertainty, I was confused, but after experiencing the unfortunates, it seems like everything fell in place. Kinda makes me think about the scripture "all things work together for the good..." You all know the rest.
Recently, things have not worked out as I have hoped. What do you do when you have a perfect plan or beautiful dream and it falls backwards? I'm telling you - it hasn't been easy. How about when you have to a tie a knot at the end of your rope and hold on to the last little bit of string that is left? Even harder!
Sometimes, it is extremely embarrassing to be completely transparent about life. But as I move from one year to the next, it seems like what I have once thought was difficult to talk about is rolling a lot smoother from my lips. For some strange reason, life has a way of making you face the truths of being strong and unsure, weak and bold, a success and having failures all at once.
So as I move from yesterday to today, I have to make a conscious effort to persevere in the face of setbacks and ambiguous moments. I have to reach deep and pull up the often forgotten strength to endure in times of weaknesses, and rely on the sometimes bruised faith to get me over these steep mountains. Oh for the love of challenges!
#LetsGo
07 November 2010
More technology, please?
Uh-o! There goes technology.
Yesterday, I purchased the myTouch4G phone, that came out on Wednesday. Lets just say - there is so much that I thought I knew but didn't really know.
See, technology is ever-changing. There's now video chat, mobile TV, live streaming and thousands of other apps in the Android market. I don't think I can keep up with all of this. Am I getting older FAST or is technology going too fast?! Maybe both.
I frown upon the day when I turn to my child (oh goodness) and ask, "Now, how do you use that?" #That'sJustWrong So, I'll just resort back to my typewriter days!
Yesterday, I purchased the myTouch4G phone, that came out on Wednesday. Lets just say - there is so much that I thought I knew but didn't really know.
See, technology is ever-changing. There's now video chat, mobile TV, live streaming and thousands of other apps in the Android market. I don't think I can keep up with all of this. Am I getting older FAST or is technology going too fast?! Maybe both.
I frown upon the day when I turn to my child (oh goodness) and ask, "Now, how do you use that?" #That'sJustWrong So, I'll just resort back to my typewriter days!
18 October 2010
Early voting
Dear Ken,
Early voting begins today! Before heading off to work, I had to go and show my support for Bill White. #LetsGoBillWhite
SN: This song here just spoke to me. Ah, I love this oldie ...
Early voting begins today! Before heading off to work, I had to go and show my support for Bill White. #LetsGoBillWhite
SN: This song here just spoke to me. Ah, I love this oldie ...
14 October 2010
Amazing life lesson
Dear Ken,
On my last day to prepare before the half marathon, I learned a really incredible lesson.
I absolutely hate running on a treadmill. Spending what seems like an infinite amount of time running in place is dreadful. Leaving work close to the sun setting, I had no other choice. Running after dark is just too dangerous.
So what’s the lesson? It’s not that I was running and going nowhere, but it was the guy who ran next to me that caused me to reflect on life. Here’s what happened:
I was really running. It was about 45-minutes into my run on an incline of 2.0 and a speed of 6.0 when a guy approached the treadmill to the right of me. To his surprise, the treadmill had a “not in service” sign posted. To hide the embarrassment, he immediately went to the left of me – finding a very operable piece of equipment.
Watching Fox News, amazed at the smiles and triumphant attitudes of those 33 men in Chile who survived underground for 69 days, I was interrupted by a continuous thump. It was the dude to the left of me running for his life. Being curious, I glanced down at how fast he was running (because clearly he was keeping up too much noise). He was running at a speed of 7.4 on an incline of 0. By this time, I had been on the treadmill for about 45 minutes running at a nice pace – with energy left to burn.
Listening to the thumping noise was rather distracting. About 10 minutes into his run, I noticed the noise began to come to a halt. As he was exiting the treadmill, he said, “Wow, it looks like you’ve been running a good minute, and you’re still going … I’m exhausted.”
It wasn’t until he left that I began to contemplate what had occurred.
See – he ran about 10 minutes at a faster pace and a lower incline but got tired and gave up. Running slower, at a higher incline, I had enough strength to last way longer after he had left.
It hit me.
Often times in life, I look at the person next to me and see how fast they are excelling in their career, education or the like, and then I look back at myself and notice that I’m moving at a much slower pace. But in all honesty, the run taught me that it’s not how fast I go in life, but the fact that I am able to succeed at the level that I am on and endure until the finish.
I’m really looking forward to the race. I’m also looking forward to the next challenges in my life.
#RunningOn
On my last day to prepare before the half marathon, I learned a really incredible lesson.
I absolutely hate running on a treadmill. Spending what seems like an infinite amount of time running in place is dreadful. Leaving work close to the sun setting, I had no other choice. Running after dark is just too dangerous.
So what’s the lesson? It’s not that I was running and going nowhere, but it was the guy who ran next to me that caused me to reflect on life. Here’s what happened:
I was really running. It was about 45-minutes into my run on an incline of 2.0 and a speed of 6.0 when a guy approached the treadmill to the right of me. To his surprise, the treadmill had a “not in service” sign posted. To hide the embarrassment, he immediately went to the left of me – finding a very operable piece of equipment.
Watching Fox News, amazed at the smiles and triumphant attitudes of those 33 men in Chile who survived underground for 69 days, I was interrupted by a continuous thump. It was the dude to the left of me running for his life. Being curious, I glanced down at how fast he was running (because clearly he was keeping up too much noise). He was running at a speed of 7.4 on an incline of 0. By this time, I had been on the treadmill for about 45 minutes running at a nice pace – with energy left to burn.
Listening to the thumping noise was rather distracting. About 10 minutes into his run, I noticed the noise began to come to a halt. As he was exiting the treadmill, he said, “Wow, it looks like you’ve been running a good minute, and you’re still going … I’m exhausted.”
It wasn’t until he left that I began to contemplate what had occurred.
See – he ran about 10 minutes at a faster pace and a lower incline but got tired and gave up. Running slower, at a higher incline, I had enough strength to last way longer after he had left.
It hit me.
Often times in life, I look at the person next to me and see how fast they are excelling in their career, education or the like, and then I look back at myself and notice that I’m moving at a much slower pace. But in all honesty, the run taught me that it’s not how fast I go in life, but the fact that I am able to succeed at the level that I am on and endure until the finish.
I’m really looking forward to the race. I’m also looking forward to the next challenges in my life.
#RunningOn
04 October 2010
Early a-m thoughts
Dear Ken,
It's dangerous to live without covering, but these last few months have increasingly shortened my faith. This is a rather embarrassing confession, but it is the truth. Mounting situations have made it difficult to see beyond the inevitable. Friends say that "this is a faith walk". But what do I do when there is no faith?
Since it's 4:15 in the morning, I better roll back over so I can be at my best at work.
Good morning :)
29 September 2010
Bishop Eddie Long, Black Church, Snapped, Economy
Dear Ken,
I am going to try this video blogging out...
I am going to try this video blogging out...
09 September 2010
What is this dude thinking (Koran-burning)?
Dear Ken,
It has been a minute since I last updated. For the past month, life has kept me rather busy. I have had a couple of joys and a few minor setbacks. Nonetheless, being able to rise up and face another day keeps me #optimistic.
Only when I thought the world could not get crazier, I turned to CNN and read about the Rev. Terry Jones, the pastor of a small church in Gainesville, Florida, who is planning a Koran-burning ceremony on the 9th anniversity of the September 11th terrorist attack. The church, with fewer than 30 congregants, plans to burn 200+ copies of the Muslim holy book.
Rev Jones has ignored harsh criticism from Gen David Pataeus, Secretary of State Clinton and even the President. Secretary Clinton calls his act “disrespectful [and] disgraceful".
While Rev Jones' act of burning the Koran is probably protected by the First Amendment, has he forgotten the principles that Jesus taught of honoring, loving and respecting other people? I am reminded of the scripture that Jesus wrote: treat others as [we] would like to be treated.
Rev Jones can disagree with Muslims and their beliefs, but to set ablaze to these books only incites violence, places several troops in Afghanistan in harm’s way and will only encourage a recruiting drive for al-Qaeda. President Obama mentioned on Good Morning America that "this could increase the recruitment of individuals who'd be willing to blow themselves up in American cities or European cities".
Dude really needs to start practicing what he preaches!
It has been a minute since I last updated. For the past month, life has kept me rather busy. I have had a couple of joys and a few minor setbacks. Nonetheless, being able to rise up and face another day keeps me #optimistic.
Only when I thought the world could not get crazier, I turned to CNN and read about the Rev. Terry Jones, the pastor of a small church in Gainesville, Florida, who is planning a Koran-burning ceremony on the 9th anniversity of the September 11th terrorist attack. The church, with fewer than 30 congregants, plans to burn 200+ copies of the Muslim holy book.
Rev Jones has ignored harsh criticism from Gen David Pataeus, Secretary of State Clinton and even the President. Secretary Clinton calls his act “disrespectful [and] disgraceful".
While Rev Jones' act of burning the Koran is probably protected by the First Amendment, has he forgotten the principles that Jesus taught of honoring, loving and respecting other people? I am reminded of the scripture that Jesus wrote: treat others as [we] would like to be treated.
Rev Jones can disagree with Muslims and their beliefs, but to set ablaze to these books only incites violence, places several troops in Afghanistan in harm’s way and will only encourage a recruiting drive for al-Qaeda. President Obama mentioned on Good Morning America that "this could increase the recruitment of individuals who'd be willing to blow themselves up in American cities or European cities".
Dude really needs to start practicing what he preaches!
06 August 2010
Vacaying
Dear Ken,
It's been a minute since we last spoke, so I wanted to drop in for roughly 2.3 seconds to give a mini update! Right now, I'm in Miami acting a fool with some of the best people in the world. We're headed out ... talk with you later.
Me
It's been a minute since we last spoke, so I wanted to drop in for roughly 2.3 seconds to give a mini update! Right now, I'm in Miami acting a fool with some of the best people in the world. We're headed out ... talk with you later.
Me
29 July 2010
Tweet this
Dear Ken,
I confess that I need to make a confession because for too long I have denied confessing that I have an addiction to twitter!!! #iConfess
Tweeting is simple and easy. I wake up tweeting. Go to bed tweeting. Send tweets in meetings. Walk tweeting. Tweet at the gym. Tweeting while clubbing. Against @Oprah's wishes, tweet while driving. In class tweeting. Tweeting at church.
It's addictive!
28 July 2010
Loving my friends
Dear Ken,
Today as I was showering, it hit me. I began to think of the amazing people in my life who are nothing short of phenomenal. Often time I fail to comprehend how truly blessed I am to have encountered some incredible acquaintances. Though my immediate circle is quite thin, those who share in my joys and sorrows on a daily basis are ones - without a shout or doubt who are consistent in their dealings and thoughtful in their advice that they give to me.
Surrounded by people who embrace differences and respect the fact that we all don't share the same taste gives me hope. These are the ones who accepts Ken without a price tag. I love these people. They're close just like family. We share tweets, have drinks, laugh, worship together, party together and sometimes cry together. I can't ask for more. Well, I could, but I don't want to appear too greedy :-).
For those who have ever made an impact in my life, given me sound counsel or have shared a memory with me, I truly cherish you! You guys and gals know who you are.
Time to workout. #MobileBlogging.
24 July 2010
Tired with work (already!)
Dear Ken,
My Saturday mornings have turned into grabbing green tea and listening to music until I consciously decide to get up out of the bed and run! Ah. Surviving the work week is now almost equivalent to getting through a painful episode of the Maury Show. The famous "When Sunday Comes" song has been replaced with tweets and facebook status updates with "When FRIDAY Comes". Some of the tweets are: (On Monday) - "#Countdown to Friday" or (on Friday) - "My favorite day of the workweek".
Is our generation already tired of working? Some of my friends and I have been in the workforce for merely 1-6 years (give or take), and according to some of our updates, work is becoming more of a task opposed to enjoyment. Working 40 hours a week to enjoy the finer things in life ... is work and our generation clashing?
Some say that we are just too young and inexperience. Others say that we are so eager and hungry for a management position ... that we desire to work less hours or we expect to make an income greater than $50,000 in our first position, and oh - don't text, e-mail or call [the young employees] about work beyond 9-5.
Getting a head start with researching employment issues, I stumbled across an article on Entrepreneur.com about 12 Benefits of Hiring Older Workers. The author had frightening point-of-views of what makes an older worker better than younger ones.
Well, on Monday, I'll be sure to update twitter with: "2 days of weekend and 5 days of work ... that ain't right!" #JustSaying
My Saturday mornings have turned into grabbing green tea and listening to music until I consciously decide to get up out of the bed and run! Ah. Surviving the work week is now almost equivalent to getting through a painful episode of the Maury Show. The famous "When Sunday Comes" song has been replaced with tweets and facebook status updates with "When FRIDAY Comes". Some of the tweets are: (On Monday) - "#Countdown to Friday" or (on Friday) - "My favorite day of the workweek".
Is our generation already tired of working? Some of my friends and I have been in the workforce for merely 1-6 years (give or take), and according to some of our updates, work is becoming more of a task opposed to enjoyment. Working 40 hours a week to enjoy the finer things in life ... is work and our generation clashing?
Some say that we are just too young and inexperience. Others say that we are so eager and hungry for a management position ... that we desire to work less hours or we expect to make an income greater than $50,000 in our first position, and oh - don't text, e-mail or call [the young employees] about work beyond 9-5.
Getting a head start with researching employment issues, I stumbled across an article on Entrepreneur.com about 12 Benefits of Hiring Older Workers. The author had frightening point-of-views of what makes an older worker better than younger ones.
Well, on Monday, I'll be sure to update twitter with: "2 days of weekend and 5 days of work ... that ain't right!" #JustSaying
17 July 2010
Countdown to Oct 9th
Dear Ken,
For the past two days, I have had my head buried in this Kaplan Review Book. With the LSAT being about 2 1/2 months away, I am in #CrunchMode. The most difficult part is that there is no proper way to prepare for the test. Recalling undergraduate, grad and some post-grad studies, it was easy to memorize a few facts, walk into the class on test day and circle the multiple choice answer or respond to an essay question. The LSAT, seemingly, requires a lot of analytical, brain-guzzling, and reasoning skills. #FML
This 498-page book review is crucial. Stubbornly, I decided against paying 3 installments of $433 to take an in-class review session. Looking back, I think I probably would have benefited by having an instructor explain some of this information to me. Though, it is not all too bad reading over the material and teaching myself ... just takes more time! When I reach a snag in the rug, I find myself being creative by resorting to YouTube videos to explain the more difficult sections. Surely my parents taught me how to hustle! O_o
Preparing for the test has definitely required me to sacrifice a lot. Forgoing the parties, hanging out with friends, losing a little sleep by staying up later, going without using social networking sites for hours and missing a few of the good shows that are still left on TV. Truly, I'm aiming as close to 180 as possible.
For the past two days, I have had my head buried in this Kaplan Review Book. With the LSAT being about 2 1/2 months away, I am in #CrunchMode. The most difficult part is that there is no proper way to prepare for the test. Recalling undergraduate, grad and some post-grad studies, it was easy to memorize a few facts, walk into the class on test day and circle the multiple choice answer or respond to an essay question. The LSAT, seemingly, requires a lot of analytical, brain-guzzling, and reasoning skills. #FML
This 498-page book review is crucial. Stubbornly, I decided against paying 3 installments of $433 to take an in-class review session. Looking back, I think I probably would have benefited by having an instructor explain some of this information to me. Though, it is not all too bad reading over the material and teaching myself ... just takes more time! When I reach a snag in the rug, I find myself being creative by resorting to YouTube videos to explain the more difficult sections. Surely my parents taught me how to hustle! O_o
Preparing for the test has definitely required me to sacrifice a lot. Forgoing the parties, hanging out with friends, losing a little sleep by staying up later, going without using social networking sites for hours and missing a few of the good shows that are still left on TV. Truly, I'm aiming as close to 180 as possible.
15 July 2010
29 June 2010
2018 (a poem i wrote 2.5 months ago)
Dear Ken,
I was kinda hesitant to post this, but I wrote this back on March 30th and published in another place, but I wanted to bring this to you to let you read it. I went through and reread it ... found a few errors - so what? It'll definitely show you how human I be :).
"2018"
I ain't even gonna lie - I'm lost. Traveling through this rough path without direction is scary. When the songwriter sung "my back is against the wall," I echo the sentiments. Head tilted to the sky ... tears streaming down my face ... now, both hands on my knees and head hung down. I think, "God, which way is right?" Afraid to go in either direction because my mind is heavy ... filled with anguish and turmoil and pain and misery and doubt and confusion. Am I delusional? Maybe so. Maybe not. This can't always be this way cause it wasn't always this way. There was a period in time when I could look up to the Father and trust Him to direct my way. But now, all I see is a blur when I seek guidance. All I can hear is noise when I ask for help. All I can feel is fierce winds beating against my body when I take one and then another step. See when I place myself in these situations, I don't understand. I seek to find. And ask to understand and challenge to grow and knock to be answered and speak to be heard and reason to make sense and walk after righteousness to live again ... be a friend to have friends. Friends. Friends ... yeah friends. Or how about friends. Who has friends? We all have friends, right? Friends who we can go to for advice or to listen or to ask questions to or to cry with and share memories with and talk to into the wee hours of the night just because their company is peaceful. But what do I do when I feel like everyone around me is moving ahead and I'm stuck in between a rock and a hard place because of unfortunate circumstances? What do I do when it feels like I've been deserted and hurt by the ones who I thought I could trust? What do I do when it feels like the world is weighing heavy on my shoulders? Some say to tie a knot at the end of my rope and hold on to what little I can. But then I turn and see fathers molesting daughters and sons being raped by their uncles they thought they could trust. Then we are forced to put our faith in a failing education system that doesn't give a damn about if we make it or not. And then we look to the church for guidance only to discover that in some instances it's just a social club or a body of believers who are so judgmental that walking through the left door is sinful. God forbid that we continue judging one another and placing ourselves higher or looking or nose down on one another. Reach back and help her get up. Yeah, you may have warned her that he was no good. So what she found herself in a domestic violence situation or strung out on drugs. Help her get some help. Yeah, maybe he is saggin his pants. But have you stopped to mentor or encourage or find out the root of why he's crying out for attention. Some people make me so sick with the hypocrisy and the folly. I'm ill to my stomach because of the republicans and their obvious racist attacks against a president who believes in one fucking nation under buddah or mohhamad or allah or confucious or god. Believe in whoever the hell you want to believe in. Go to mass. Go to the kingdom hall. Go to the synagogue. Go to the temple. Go to church. Be independent. Do you. I'm so sick and tired of you telling me that I'm wrong because I'm doubtful or worry. Or that I'm abnormal because I believe on sundays when the sermon feels good and then have a hard time trusting on Tuesday through Friday. See mondays and saturdays are okay because I either just came down from a high or anticipating another high. Church has been minimized to a big pep rally, money sucking, pastor pimping organization. Maybe I'm hurt or just simply don't care anymore. Care anymore. Care anymore. Yep. That's how it feels when the little three-year old girl is walking the street barefoot because her mother is strung out on dope - with the needle still sitting in her vein - trying to find food ... can you see her with the strap of the sandle in her mouth - hopeless. We turn and walk away and get out big mansion on the other side of town - afraid to confront the real issues in our backyard. Our masters or doctorate or law degrees start to define us. We forget that we are all like sheep. Or does that verse still exist? The four year old rocking himself to sleep because he witness three and four men walking in and out of the house because the mom gotta do what she gotta do to make a living. And then he goes to school - sleeping in class and then eventually becomes a problem because he's gotten to the sixth grade and can't read. Instead of the school identifying his problem in kindergarten, then label him as "special ed" by the eighth grade. Too embarrassed by his label, he resorts to skipping school and selling drugs because he fits in ... initiated into a gang because he's finally accepted. It's too late now because he has true family, or so he thinks, that loves him. Shit, he just broke into your house the other day. And just last week, he robbed the grocery store and held one of the cashier workers at gun point. His picture is now blasted all across the news because we didn't catch him when he was 4. Standing in front of the judge, she reads off all the charges and no room for rehabilitation because you know what the systems do to those who they are afraid to give help to. Damn, just how fucked up is our judicial system and our penal codes and our governmental agencies. Give me my food stamp card. I want my health care card. Give me WIC ... wait, those are the entitlement programs that the wealthy are seeking to dissolve. Somebody gotta help me. I don't want to work. I just wanna sit at home until the employment benefits run out and then rely on uncle sam to foot the bill. I need the section 8 and then HUD housing. Man, someday our society will wake up and stare the problems in the face. I'm going to get me something to eat.
#imjustsaying
I was kinda hesitant to post this, but I wrote this back on March 30th and published in another place, but I wanted to bring this to you to let you read it. I went through and reread it ... found a few errors - so what? It'll definitely show you how human I be :).
"2018"
I ain't even gonna lie - I'm lost. Traveling through this rough path without direction is scary. When the songwriter sung "my back is against the wall," I echo the sentiments. Head tilted to the sky ... tears streaming down my face ... now, both hands on my knees and head hung down. I think, "God, which way is right?" Afraid to go in either direction because my mind is heavy ... filled with anguish and turmoil and pain and misery and doubt and confusion. Am I delusional? Maybe so. Maybe not. This can't always be this way cause it wasn't always this way. There was a period in time when I could look up to the Father and trust Him to direct my way. But now, all I see is a blur when I seek guidance. All I can hear is noise when I ask for help. All I can feel is fierce winds beating against my body when I take one and then another step. See when I place myself in these situations, I don't understand. I seek to find. And ask to understand and challenge to grow and knock to be answered and speak to be heard and reason to make sense and walk after righteousness to live again ... be a friend to have friends. Friends. Friends ... yeah friends. Or how about friends. Who has friends? We all have friends, right? Friends who we can go to for advice or to listen or to ask questions to or to cry with and share memories with and talk to into the wee hours of the night just because their company is peaceful. But what do I do when I feel like everyone around me is moving ahead and I'm stuck in between a rock and a hard place because of unfortunate circumstances? What do I do when it feels like I've been deserted and hurt by the ones who I thought I could trust? What do I do when it feels like the world is weighing heavy on my shoulders? Some say to tie a knot at the end of my rope and hold on to what little I can. But then I turn and see fathers molesting daughters and sons being raped by their uncles they thought they could trust. Then we are forced to put our faith in a failing education system that doesn't give a damn about if we make it or not. And then we look to the church for guidance only to discover that in some instances it's just a social club or a body of believers who are so judgmental that walking through the left door is sinful. God forbid that we continue judging one another and placing ourselves higher or looking or nose down on one another. Reach back and help her get up. Yeah, you may have warned her that he was no good. So what she found herself in a domestic violence situation or strung out on drugs. Help her get some help. Yeah, maybe he is saggin his pants. But have you stopped to mentor or encourage or find out the root of why he's crying out for attention. Some people make me so sick with the hypocrisy and the folly. I'm ill to my stomach because of the republicans and their obvious racist attacks against a president who believes in one fucking nation under buddah or mohhamad or allah or confucious or god. Believe in whoever the hell you want to believe in. Go to mass. Go to the kingdom hall. Go to the synagogue. Go to the temple. Go to church. Be independent. Do you. I'm so sick and tired of you telling me that I'm wrong because I'm doubtful or worry. Or that I'm abnormal because I believe on sundays when the sermon feels good and then have a hard time trusting on Tuesday through Friday. See mondays and saturdays are okay because I either just came down from a high or anticipating another high. Church has been minimized to a big pep rally, money sucking, pastor pimping organization. Maybe I'm hurt or just simply don't care anymore. Care anymore. Care anymore. Yep. That's how it feels when the little three-year old girl is walking the street barefoot because her mother is strung out on dope - with the needle still sitting in her vein - trying to find food ... can you see her with the strap of the sandle in her mouth - hopeless. We turn and walk away and get out big mansion on the other side of town - afraid to confront the real issues in our backyard. Our masters or doctorate or law degrees start to define us. We forget that we are all like sheep. Or does that verse still exist? The four year old rocking himself to sleep because he witness three and four men walking in and out of the house because the mom gotta do what she gotta do to make a living. And then he goes to school - sleeping in class and then eventually becomes a problem because he's gotten to the sixth grade and can't read. Instead of the school identifying his problem in kindergarten, then label him as "special ed" by the eighth grade. Too embarrassed by his label, he resorts to skipping school and selling drugs because he fits in ... initiated into a gang because he's finally accepted. It's too late now because he has true family, or so he thinks, that loves him. Shit, he just broke into your house the other day. And just last week, he robbed the grocery store and held one of the cashier workers at gun point. His picture is now blasted all across the news because we didn't catch him when he was 4. Standing in front of the judge, she reads off all the charges and no room for rehabilitation because you know what the systems do to those who they are afraid to give help to. Damn, just how fucked up is our judicial system and our penal codes and our governmental agencies. Give me my food stamp card. I want my health care card. Give me WIC ... wait, those are the entitlement programs that the wealthy are seeking to dissolve. Somebody gotta help me. I don't want to work. I just wanna sit at home until the employment benefits run out and then rely on uncle sam to foot the bill. I need the section 8 and then HUD housing. Man, someday our society will wake up and stare the problems in the face. I'm going to get me something to eat.
#imjustsaying
22 June 2010
Response: Listening to America's Youth
Dear Ken,
Before calling it a night, I just wanted to share with you what I wrote in response to an article posted on The Kitchen Table's blog. The article, entitled Listening to America's Youth, was about the perception of younger, church attendees, and how African-American history should be discussed more in the church. Here is my take:
Church, in all due respect, has become a social playground. I often engage in meaningful conversations with my friends about this issue. Young people are turned off by cliques and associations that have been established in the church. Where the church once was a beacon of hope for the downtrodden and a lightening rod of restoration for those who hurt -- has turned into preachers pimping the congregants and promising miracles and blessings for sacrificial seeds. This insults the intelligence of the young (and old), critical thinkers, who view the Higher One as more than a glorified sugar daddy.
While the church might not be perfect, you are correct in pointing out the significance of tradition and history. Whereas tradition calls for devotion, the new church accepts a praise team for praise and worship. Whereas the former church clings to legalistic principles such as women not preaching, unable to wear pants, not sitting in the pulpit or wearing makeup - the new age church is accepting of women rights to have participatory roles.
History is definitely important. Also, embracing change and the creativity of each church reaching the Higher One in their own way should be equally understood.
Before calling it a night, I just wanted to share with you what I wrote in response to an article posted on The Kitchen Table's blog. The article, entitled Listening to America's Youth, was about the perception of younger, church attendees, and how African-American history should be discussed more in the church. Here is my take:
Church, in all due respect, has become a social playground. I often engage in meaningful conversations with my friends about this issue. Young people are turned off by cliques and associations that have been established in the church. Where the church once was a beacon of hope for the downtrodden and a lightening rod of restoration for those who hurt -- has turned into preachers pimping the congregants and promising miracles and blessings for sacrificial seeds. This insults the intelligence of the young (and old), critical thinkers, who view the Higher One as more than a glorified sugar daddy.
While the church might not be perfect, you are correct in pointing out the significance of tradition and history. Whereas tradition calls for devotion, the new church accepts a praise team for praise and worship. Whereas the former church clings to legalistic principles such as women not preaching, unable to wear pants, not sitting in the pulpit or wearing makeup - the new age church is accepting of women rights to have participatory roles.
History is definitely important. Also, embracing change and the creativity of each church reaching the Higher One in their own way should be equally understood.
19 June 2010
Father's Day
Dear Ken,
Father's day is quickly approaching. Actually, it's tomorrrow. I can remember like yesterday when my father divorced us when I was in the second grade. That was roughly 17 years ago ... 7 years old, at the time. We had just moved. At the time, from my 7-year old lenses, it appeared that there were no major rough points in my parent’s marriage. Nonetheless, the ugliness of adultery robbed me of several years of his presence. Growing up for a good portion of the time in a single parent household was extremely difficult.
Reflecting on what one of my friend likes to refer to as “Baby’s Daddy Day,” I am compelled to recall the most fondest memories I have shared with my pops. Travelling down memory lane, some of the days have been amazing, while others have not always been the best. While my adolescent years were the most fragile and sensitive time, to date. I longed to spend time with him -- having conversations of reassurance. Those were some tough days. Because of his absence, I resorted to extreme defense mechanisms to cope with life … hard!
Lately, we have been in the process of repairing our relationship. It has not been the easiest thing, by far, but I am amazed at the continued progress. This task has required a lot of patience, from both parties. I look forward to spending the day appreciating him for being there, when he could, and for the love and support that he shows.
To all the fathers out there – Happy Father’s Day!
17 June 2010
Morning Ramblings
When I should be in the bed, I'm up at 2:05 in the a-m blogging. Unable to sleep, I resort to the next best thing - the internet! Today was a great day. No major complaints. I was able to achieve everything that was scheduled on the "to-do list". Looking back, time went by way too fast.
Preparing for the days ahead, it seems like there is so much to do and so little time to get things done. My life now consists of studying for the LSAT, reading blogs, working, a little partying (okay - a little more than a little), tweeting, and working some more. I haven't even really had a telephone conversation with some of my good friends in a long time. My mom was complaining that I rarely come to visit and how a 5 minute drive-by would be incredibly special. Guess this weekend I'll stop over.
This dieting and working out thing is going great. I'm feeling 120% better as a result of going to the gym, doing cardio, weight lifting and some of the free classes. Changing the way I eat has been a challenge. I can't even dispute that sometimes I get so tempted to stop by a fast food restaurant and chow down. However, instead of forgoing the fast food altogether, I've place strict limitations on what I can eat and how often (maybe once every 2 weeks).
I'm starting to get sleepy, but I wouldn't dare close without mentioning that I'm getting ready to start back going out on dates. After almost 2 years of living the bachelor life, I think I'm a little more mature for the whole couple lifestyle. I've ran across some really interesting folks and some real problematic ones as well. Guess the weeding and sorting is about to begin. Oh, what are you all's thoughts of long-distance dating? Does it work? How far is too far? How often should those in the relationship commit to seeing each other? Just thinking...
Not proofreading. Good night/morning.
Preparing for the days ahead, it seems like there is so much to do and so little time to get things done. My life now consists of studying for the LSAT, reading blogs, working, a little partying (okay - a little more than a little), tweeting, and working some more. I haven't even really had a telephone conversation with some of my good friends in a long time. My mom was complaining that I rarely come to visit and how a 5 minute drive-by would be incredibly special. Guess this weekend I'll stop over.
This dieting and working out thing is going great. I'm feeling 120% better as a result of going to the gym, doing cardio, weight lifting and some of the free classes. Changing the way I eat has been a challenge. I can't even dispute that sometimes I get so tempted to stop by a fast food restaurant and chow down. However, instead of forgoing the fast food altogether, I've place strict limitations on what I can eat and how often (maybe once every 2 weeks).
I'm starting to get sleepy, but I wouldn't dare close without mentioning that I'm getting ready to start back going out on dates. After almost 2 years of living the bachelor life, I think I'm a little more mature for the whole couple lifestyle. I've ran across some really interesting folks and some real problematic ones as well. Guess the weeding and sorting is about to begin. Oh, what are you all's thoughts of long-distance dating? Does it work? How far is too far? How often should those in the relationship commit to seeing each other? Just thinking...
Not proofreading. Good night/morning.
13 June 2010
Struggle
This one vice is getting the best of me. Often times, I think, "if I didn't struggle in this area, I would be ok." This truly keeps my face to the ground. Not out of embarrassment but in hopes of establishing some sort of plan to do better. I look at the situation day in and day out and nothing seems to improve. I might go a week without thinking of engaging, but sometimes, the weight of doing overshadows the times without.
Removing the mask and confronting this issue head on has been quite difficult. I've tried fasting in hopes of gaining some sort of discipline ... much failure! And then, professional help, ie counseling didn't help either. So I look at this and ask, "what do I do next?" Should I reevaluate the situation and continue to make excuses or microscopically examine the root cause? Well, at least, that's what the highly recommended counselor suggested. And after I've gotten to the bottom of the condition, then what?
Is is that I'm seeking one thing and forgetting the other? Or do I already have what I'm seeking and lack the self-control? Whatever the case might be, all I know is that I stand by what I wrote earlier: "This one vice is getting the best of me".
What are your struggles?
Removing the mask and confronting this issue head on has been quite difficult. I've tried fasting in hopes of gaining some sort of discipline ... much failure! And then, professional help, ie counseling didn't help either. So I look at this and ask, "what do I do next?" Should I reevaluate the situation and continue to make excuses or microscopically examine the root cause? Well, at least, that's what the highly recommended counselor suggested. And after I've gotten to the bottom of the condition, then what?
Is is that I'm seeking one thing and forgetting the other? Or do I already have what I'm seeking and lack the self-control? Whatever the case might be, all I know is that I stand by what I wrote earlier: "This one vice is getting the best of me".
What are your struggles?
10 June 2010
If/then
So I'm sitting here studying for the LSAT. I came across the "Formal Logic in Logical Reasoning" section. This is generally referred to as the conditional or if/then statements. So the example is:
If a person lives in the US, then that person must be living in North America.
From the statement, one would conclude: a person who lives in the US lives in North America, but not necessarily the opposite.
Reading further into the explanation, there's one sentence that caught my attention: "So, although you can be sure that the condition depends upon the result, you can never assume that the result requires the condition to occur."
Ok - so what am I getting at?
Nothing really. I just wanted to find a way to throw out my favorite scripture - Isaiah 59:1 (Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear). With this written, if the Lord's hands are not too short and if His ears are not too heavy, then I can rest assure that He will save and hear me!
#imjustsaying
If a person lives in the US, then that person must be living in North America.
From the statement, one would conclude: a person who lives in the US lives in North America, but not necessarily the opposite.
Reading further into the explanation, there's one sentence that caught my attention: "So, although you can be sure that the condition depends upon the result, you can never assume that the result requires the condition to occur."
Ok - so what am I getting at?
Nothing really. I just wanted to find a way to throw out my favorite scripture - Isaiah 59:1 (Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear). With this written, if the Lord's hands are not too short and if His ears are not too heavy, then I can rest assure that He will save and hear me!
#imjustsaying
02 April 2010
Survival!!
Leaving the "7 last sayings of Christ," I feel so proud of myself that I was able to participate in lenten season these past 47 days. I have to admit, two things got the best of me, but I was able to forgo the third - alcohol! Well, if there's a next year, I know what I won't be going without ;-).
Good day!
21 March 2010
Happy Health Care Reform!
Change has finally come to America. Representatives in the House did the right thing by passing health care reform legislation. By now, you have heard all the reasons why. This is not end, but we are definitely headed in right direction. A number of presidents have tried and failed, but President Obama and his administration got it done. Lets work to continue changing America!
19 March 2010
18 March 2010
"All blacks need to leave the store"
... and who said we are living in a post-racial America? I beg to differ!
Coming out of New Jersey, several shoppers in Wal Mart heard: "Attention, Wal-Mart shoppers, all blacks need to leave the store" - over the store's loudspeaker. Can you believe this?
Although this may have been a prank and probably not even sanctioned by Wal Mart or one of its employees, this definitely leaves a sour taste in the mouths of black people.
As we try to shift our mindset to see beyond the color of an individual, instances such as this teaches us that we have not arrived. Even further, this shows that we should continue to have open discussions about racism and the importance of embracing others and their differences. Moving past racism is no easy undertaking, and we should not sweep a situation such as this under the rug. Lets engage.
#teachablemoments
Coming out of New Jersey, several shoppers in Wal Mart heard: "Attention, Wal-Mart shoppers, all blacks need to leave the store" - over the store's loudspeaker. Can you believe this?
Although this may have been a prank and probably not even sanctioned by Wal Mart or one of its employees, this definitely leaves a sour taste in the mouths of black people.
As we try to shift our mindset to see beyond the color of an individual, instances such as this teaches us that we have not arrived. Even further, this shows that we should continue to have open discussions about racism and the importance of embracing others and their differences. Moving past racism is no easy undertaking, and we should not sweep a situation such as this under the rug. Lets engage.
#teachablemoments
13 March 2010
Running
Have 2 more laps on this 7-mile run/jog interval ... feeling exhausted. Nonetheless, this has been an incredible relaxer! Listening to "Peace be still" by Vanessa Bell Armstrong. She's taking me around this track! Uh-oh, stomach cramp.
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