2008 has been one heck of a year. So much has happened, literally. The month of December, alone, was one of the toughest times. Generally, at the end of the year, many people contemplate how things will be different in the New Year. It amazes me that the day, month and year changes, but situations remain the same... having a hard time dealing with a break-up on December 31st? Well, on January 1st of the new year, more likely than not, those same sentiments exist.
This year, I felt liberated by some things of my past; however, I do not feel one-hundred percent free. I am slowly starting to embrace who I was created to be. This has been a huge transition in many regards - taking off the mascara, lipstick and makeup to reveal the blemishes, scars and scratches. I have been able to be more transparent since taking off the concealing mask.
The beginning of the year went seemingly perfect. I was in a relationship that I thought would last forever, surrounded by incredible friends and family, working in a position for a couple of months that I thought would eventually be my dream job and having a blast living. Things suddenly made a turn once life revealed herself through major disappointments and setbacks. I endured a tough breakup, made a career altering decision, changed friends and was forced to accept the truth that life can catch us off guard - even if we are prepared to deal with the harsh reality of pains, sicknesses or distractions. Instead of standing up to some of the situations head on, I chose to resort to alcohol. She became my best friend. Well, second to partying. I slowly felt the convictions of deciphering between right and wrong slip out the back door. People who I envisioned a lifetime of happiness with left me in below freezing temperatures without any clothing. I lost my identity of who Kendrick was. I found myself having to redefine, reduce, make constant assessments and restructures to find what truly made me happy - all of which I still struggle with to this day.
In a management class last semester, I read this article about the famous late J.C. Penney. He was quoted as saying: "You cannot build a solid, substantial house with decayed planks, no matter what kind of a veneer is put over their rottenness." Although he was referring to employees using ethical techniques, I often reference this quote in essence of reminding myself that life happens. Instead of trying to cover up blemishes or live a fairytale, I make it a priority to address situations without reservations. This reminds me of a time when a friend told me about a dream he had a few weeks ago. He mentioned that he was playing the role of a personal assistant to a famous singer. During the singer's performance, out of nowhere, a man came out with a black curtain to cover the show. The singer ran off stage. While people were trying to keep her calm in the greenroom, she grabbed her makeup bag and told those around her, "I'm not letting this guy ruin my show; I'm putting my lipstick back on and I'm getting back out there." So for this upcoming year, reflect on life obstacles that almost kept you from performing. Perhaps it wasn't a person with a black sheet interrupting your singing to a sold out crowd, but negative thinking people, a failed relationship, a financial crisis, a layoff or other temporary setbacks. I encourage you all to get your makeup bag, put your lipstick back on and stay in the game of life!
*knockout*
