Most people struggle with an addiction. Whether it's sexual, work, alcohol, shopping, porn, drugs, eating, exercising, internet (facebook, twitter), or playing video games. People become addicts because the activity has a positive feeling. There is an excitement that entices a continual dependency. Addictions in some form can be extremely destructive. Marriages have ended, children have severed ties with their parents (vice versa), some have lost jobs and others have thrown up their hands and walked away from everything. The consequences of being an addict can have such devastating results.
Dealing with addictions can be the hardest struggles a person faces. The question than an addict generally has is: "Why can't I stop?" Being addicted to anything can be embarrassing. Often times, people refrain from discussing their addiction of out fear that people will perceive them as lacking self-control. In most instances, the desire is so overwhelming that it takes up a huge portion of their time either through the consumption or thoughts of engaging.
What is an addiction that you are dealing with? Perhaps it’s something that you do not speak of. Perhaps others are aware. What is your strategic plan that you have in place to help you overcome this addiction? I would encourage you to speak with a licensed counselor or professional to discuss your addiction. Here are some website resources:
Addiction Help Line
Overcoming Pornography Addiction (University of Texas Dallas)
The Center for Internet Addiction
Alcoholic and Drug Addictions
Also, check with your health insurance provider. Most carries support these types of services.
18 October 2009
14 October 2009
High scores on nat'l math test
Texas students tally strong scores in national math test
By TERRENCE STUTZ / The Dallas Morning Newststutz@dallasnews.com
AUSTIN – Black students in Texas scored at or near the top compared with their counterparts across the nation on a national math test this year, while the state as a whole ranked near the middle on the "Nation's Report Card" exam.
Results released Wednesday on the National Assessment of Educational Progress indicated that black eighth graders in Texas tied Massachusetts for first place on the math test, while black fourth graders from Texas earned the third-highest score among the states.
Overall, Texas ranked 27th on the fourth grade exam and 18th on the eighth grade exam. The state's ranking was primarily the result of a large proportion of minority students – who typically underperform white students on standardized tests – compared with other states.
White fourth graders in Texas tied for fifth place in their peer group and Hispanic fourth graders in Texas ranked eighth nationwide. White and Hispanic eighth graders each ranked fourth within their respective peer groups.
The NAEP is closely monitored because it is the only assessment test given to students in all states and is the basis for the Nation's Report Card issued by the U.S. Department of Education. The test was given to a scientifically selected sample of nearly 330,000 fourth and eighth graders in all states earlier this year.
"Today's results describe the strong performance Texas students have consistently shown on the NAEP mathematics test," state Education Commissioner Robert Scott said Wednesday. "Our rigorous state standards in math provide a solid academic base for our students."
Nationally, scores for fourth graders showed no overall increase from the last exam two years ago, while scores for eighth graders went up slightly.
13 October 2009
Health care (once more)
The Senate Finance Committee is expected to vote on a possible, 10-year massive health care overhaul. Is this what President Obama campaigned for? Yes and no. Will it do for now? Maybe. While this compromise was expected to gain bipartisan support, only one Republican is expected to vote on the final bill once it hit the senate floor (and that's a maybe). Needless to say, I am a little upset with the democrats. I voted for change, and this is semi-change. I understand the process of taking incremental steps to change; however, this bill leaves out the public option that drew much contention from the minority party on Capitol Hill. It would be perfect to give and take if the republicans actually had a crafted bill to give or take from.
Highlights of the Baucus plan (named after the Finance Committee Chairman, Max Baucus):
-within 10 years reduce national deficit by $80 billion
-at least 29 million people will be covered within 10 years
-94% of nonelderly people will be covered
Today will definitely be interesting.
Highlights of the Baucus plan (named after the Finance Committee Chairman, Max Baucus):
-within 10 years reduce national deficit by $80 billion
-at least 29 million people will be covered within 10 years
-94% of nonelderly people will be covered
Today will definitely be interesting.
09 October 2009
President Obama wins 2009 Nobel Peace Prize
President Obama wins the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize - making him the 4th US President to win such notoriety.
In less than a year into his presidency, it is obvious that the committee is seeking to endorse his foreign policy -- which is a slap in the face to former President George W. Bush. Because of President Obama's willingness to reengage in parts of the middle east, creating such international alliance, his administration's view on climate change and wanting to dialogue with those who are a threat to our nation -- are all reasons for him winning such a coveted award. Though he has not accomplished much in the international arena, this will definitely help him and his administration further their global promises.
Only two other sitting US presidents have won the award -- President Theodore Roosevelt (1906) and President Woodrow Wilson (1919). Two decades after the end of his presidency, President Jimmy Carter won the award (2002).
In less than a year into his presidency, it is obvious that the committee is seeking to endorse his foreign policy -- which is a slap in the face to former President George W. Bush. Because of President Obama's willingness to reengage in parts of the middle east, creating such international alliance, his administration's view on climate change and wanting to dialogue with those who are a threat to our nation -- are all reasons for him winning such a coveted award. Though he has not accomplished much in the international arena, this will definitely help him and his administration further their global promises.
Only two other sitting US presidents have won the award -- President Theodore Roosevelt (1906) and President Woodrow Wilson (1919). Two decades after the end of his presidency, President Jimmy Carter won the award (2002).
08 October 2009
Ron Clark Academy on Health Care Reform
Even the students at the Ron Clark Academy get it – health care needs a reform. With the possibility of one republican crossing the aisle (Senior Senator of Maine, Olympia Snowe), the democrats in Congress are capable of making it happen.
Students at Ron Clark Academy first made national headlines when the students created a video "You can vote however you like" and posted it on YouTube. Since then, students have made nationally televised appearances – from ABC to CNN. At first, the group of students rapped in a nonpartisan fashion. However, their latest video on health care reform seems the students are leaning to the left, which I admire! Enjoy:
03 October 2009
Blended Families
Second grade was a life-changing time for me. I recall my mom and dad uprooting and relocating for my father's job. During this crucial time, being in an unfamiliar city, my father consciously decided to step outside of the marriage. He eventually divorced us and left. At the age of only 7 or 8 -- the realities of my father not being present was simply bewildering. The emptiness devastated me.
Just recently, I tried to count this whole ordeal as complete; however, the memories simply won't fade. Not wishing to place blame or fault on anyone, I occasionally replay the "what if's..." and wonder how different my life would be had he continued in his capacity of being the absolute father figure.
My mom is a true catalyst of having a robust spirit and being able to endure the hard pressures of life. Because of her immense attitude of refusing to succumb to the tragedy of being alone and single, she began dating again. Being immature and a selfish child, I wanted her all to myself. Her now-husband, who I grudgedly call my step father, only complicated the situation. He was an anomaly to our family being able to successfully move forward after the divorce. I still cringe at the very thought of the day he moved in with us.
An article titled, "The Role of Being a Step Dad" mentions that step dads often have a hard time adjusting to the natural love that a hereditary father might have for his child. One could expect there to be difficulties and jealousies after being blindsided and forced to allow someone else into the family picture. The article mentions that “a new step dad may have the willingness and be putting forth the effort to grow into this relationship with the kids, but the kids may have trouble adapting to this and need their own time to adjust to it” (Velez, 1999).
A friend and I who share similar experiences were discussing our views of a blended family. Does it work? We concluded that the blended family could work. However, the new person has to be introduced in a very cautious manner and cannot be viewed as someone who is intruding or attempting to replace the father. This could have a long-term detrimental effect on the future of the step dad and the child’s relationship. Speaking first hand, accepting my step dad has been one of my greatest struggles – even after 15 years.
Just recently, I tried to count this whole ordeal as complete; however, the memories simply won't fade. Not wishing to place blame or fault on anyone, I occasionally replay the "what if's..." and wonder how different my life would be had he continued in his capacity of being the absolute father figure.
My mom is a true catalyst of having a robust spirit and being able to endure the hard pressures of life. Because of her immense attitude of refusing to succumb to the tragedy of being alone and single, she began dating again. Being immature and a selfish child, I wanted her all to myself. Her now-husband, who I grudgedly call my step father, only complicated the situation. He was an anomaly to our family being able to successfully move forward after the divorce. I still cringe at the very thought of the day he moved in with us.
An article titled, "The Role of Being a Step Dad" mentions that step dads often have a hard time adjusting to the natural love that a hereditary father might have for his child. One could expect there to be difficulties and jealousies after being blindsided and forced to allow someone else into the family picture. The article mentions that “a new step dad may have the willingness and be putting forth the effort to grow into this relationship with the kids, but the kids may have trouble adapting to this and need their own time to adjust to it” (Velez, 1999).
A friend and I who share similar experiences were discussing our views of a blended family. Does it work? We concluded that the blended family could work. However, the new person has to be introduced in a very cautious manner and cannot be viewed as someone who is intruding or attempting to replace the father. This could have a long-term detrimental effect on the future of the step dad and the child’s relationship. Speaking first hand, accepting my step dad has been one of my greatest struggles – even after 15 years.
01 October 2009
10 September 2009
Health care speech afterthoughts
The gang has cleared from my space. We gathered to watch President Obama give the health care reform speech to Congress. Now I am here burning the midnight oil collecting my thoughts on tonight's address. Surely my faith in him, his promises and in his administration has been reaffirmed. He gave a speech at a crucial time that will move this issue forward. At a time when some Americans began losing hope, he came - as he always does - to reassure us that he has not given up on the fight that will eventually allow accessible and affordable health care.
I could discuss the hecklers such as Representative Joe Wilson of South Carolina who yelled "you lie" to the President of the United States or Representative Louie Gohmert of Texas who had a sign around his neck that read "What bill?" (that's for a later entry)... However, I will focus my attention on the letter that President Obama mentioned in his speech - the letter that dear Senator Ted Kennedy wrote to him in May. Check it out here.
I could discuss the hecklers such as Representative Joe Wilson of South Carolina who yelled "you lie" to the President of the United States or Representative Louie Gohmert of Texas who had a sign around his neck that read "What bill?" (that's for a later entry)... However, I will focus my attention on the letter that President Obama mentioned in his speech - the letter that dear Senator Ted Kennedy wrote to him in May. Check it out here.
05 September 2009
No public option – No reform
Last summer I worked vigorously with countless of other Obama supporters to help him win the presidency. One of his major campaign promises was to revamp the failing health care system.
If you believe that the current health care system is not supporting all Americans, then I dare you to get on board and rally behind the public option. America needs this – not a “trigger system” that reports indicate that Obama is leaning towards to appease the republicans and blue dog democrats. Fiscal conservatives argue that a public option is too expensive, it’s too massive, and he’s pushing forth a socialist agenda. Give me a break. What is too expensive is voting to fund a war that we should have never entered. Health care is increasing, insurance companies are failing to provide services to those who have preexisting conditions, and millions of Americans are without coverage.
Many of my friends who are either finishing or finished college are participating in unpaid internships without healthcare. There are equal or greater people employed at companies who do not offer health insurance. Most companies have inserted clauses that drop coverage after one reaches a certain age (ie. I was dropped from my parent’s insurance once I reached 23). Thankfully my employer provides reasonably affordable insurance. However, without this public option, I fear that what I’m paying now will double or triple. This is the perfect opportunity to revamp the system and hold insurance company’s accountable to providing ethical coverage.
We elected President Obama to overturn the politics of the past. He cannot afford to break away or concede to those who are unwilling to offer up solutions or compromises. He cannot give in to the insurance lobbyists who are injecting fear and blatant lies into the health care reform discussions nor can he turn back on his campaign promises. This is important. The public option is absolutely necessary and will be a great way of regulating the current prices of insurance.
No public option – No reform.
If you believe that the current health care system is not supporting all Americans, then I dare you to get on board and rally behind the public option. America needs this – not a “trigger system” that reports indicate that Obama is leaning towards to appease the republicans and blue dog democrats. Fiscal conservatives argue that a public option is too expensive, it’s too massive, and he’s pushing forth a socialist agenda. Give me a break. What is too expensive is voting to fund a war that we should have never entered. Health care is increasing, insurance companies are failing to provide services to those who have preexisting conditions, and millions of Americans are without coverage.
Many of my friends who are either finishing or finished college are participating in unpaid internships without healthcare. There are equal or greater people employed at companies who do not offer health insurance. Most companies have inserted clauses that drop coverage after one reaches a certain age (ie. I was dropped from my parent’s insurance once I reached 23). Thankfully my employer provides reasonably affordable insurance. However, without this public option, I fear that what I’m paying now will double or triple. This is the perfect opportunity to revamp the system and hold insurance company’s accountable to providing ethical coverage.
We elected President Obama to overturn the politics of the past. He cannot afford to break away or concede to those who are unwilling to offer up solutions or compromises. He cannot give in to the insurance lobbyists who are injecting fear and blatant lies into the health care reform discussions nor can he turn back on his campaign promises. This is important. The public option is absolutely necessary and will be a great way of regulating the current prices of insurance.
No public option – No reform.
27 August 2009
I didn't know my own strength
Struggles. Fear. Dilemmas. Vicissitudes. Problems. Failing. Difficulties. Situations. Issues. Weaknesses. Miseries. Pain. Hurt. Falling.
Life can sometime throw hardballs that will cause you to question your faith. Doubt starts to creep in, anger builds and giving up seems the easy way out. Challenge yourself to use the negatives as opportunities to start afresh. Tie a knot at the end of your rope, rewrite your strategy and crawl if you have to - to reach the finishing point. Don't break.
Check out song#7 at http://www.whitneyhouston.com/.
Life can sometime throw hardballs that will cause you to question your faith. Doubt starts to creep in, anger builds and giving up seems the easy way out. Challenge yourself to use the negatives as opportunities to start afresh. Tie a knot at the end of your rope, rewrite your strategy and crawl if you have to - to reach the finishing point. Don't break.
Check out song#7 at http://www.whitneyhouston.com/.
17 August 2009
Sermon notes (8-16-09)
No matter how late one stays out the night before, it is a ritual in most black families to be in someone's worship service on Sunday mornings. For the past seven consecutive Sundays, I have been a regular visitor at St John Baptist Church in Grand Prairie, Texas. Dr. Denny Davis is a phenomenal speaker who provides practical and relevant sermon subjects. Yesterday, he preached a sermon titled "Don't become disqualified". Thank goodness for the G1 telephone. I'm able to take notes during the sermon, and I'd like to share the message that he preached during the 11 o'clock service. Enjoy!
1 Cor. 9:16-27
Don't become disqualified
-Professional, college and even high school athletes who’ve used performance enhancement drugs have had their titles and victories stripped of them b/c they disqualified themselves
-We can spend a lifetime preparing for our moment in the spotlight while destroying that moment in the end
-Don't take any moment of glory for granted
-People have blown great opportunities and chances - unfortunately forfeiting life's achievement due to a mindless act
-Life can be compared to a sporting event
-Be mindful of the things that can disqualify me
-One thoughtless moment can cause me everything – even after developing skills, talents & abilities
-Don’t live life “in the moment” forgetting the investments and sacrifices incurred along the way to succees
Tips to surviving temptations & finishing strong:
1. Take some time to develop convictions
-Something should sustain, keep and restrain me
-I must develop the right principles (v17)
-I have been given a trust and I need to know how to handle my options
-Life doesn't owe me anything… not a sense of entitlement; there are others more deserving.
-God expects me to operate on his behalf
-He’s entrusting me to be a witness 24/7
-Privileges that are given is because God trusts me & the picture is bigger than me
-Always be a drum major for truth by demonstrating the right priorities (Galatians 6)
-Display right practices
-My goal should be to do whatever it takes to win one for Christ – as Paul mentions
-Live in such a way that I inspire someone else to come to Christ
-My life should not be about me but should be about other people.
-There is someone watching my footsteps. Am I living in such a way that someone would want to follow my footsteps? (1979 blizzard… son follow footsteps of dad home)
2. Take time to develop character (v23)
-Never assume that I'm going to grow old
-Don't live life with regrets
-Life is important, individual, and intense
-Give life and God my best… don’t miss any opportunities by worrying about who’s running against me
-The race is not given to the swift or strong but to the one that endures to the end
-Life is intense (v25)
-Great opportunities have been afforded to some, but not everyone can the handle spotlight because they lack integrity
3. Take time to develop consistency
-Life requires development
-Strive to be intentional in everything that I do.
-Do not go through life aiming without a target
1 Cor. 9:16-27
Don't become disqualified
-Professional, college and even high school athletes who’ve used performance enhancement drugs have had their titles and victories stripped of them b/c they disqualified themselves
-We can spend a lifetime preparing for our moment in the spotlight while destroying that moment in the end
-Don't take any moment of glory for granted
-People have blown great opportunities and chances - unfortunately forfeiting life's achievement due to a mindless act
-Life can be compared to a sporting event
-Be mindful of the things that can disqualify me
-One thoughtless moment can cause me everything – even after developing skills, talents & abilities
-Don’t live life “in the moment” forgetting the investments and sacrifices incurred along the way to succees
Tips to surviving temptations & finishing strong:
1. Take some time to develop convictions
-Something should sustain, keep and restrain me
-I must develop the right principles (v17)
-I have been given a trust and I need to know how to handle my options
-Life doesn't owe me anything… not a sense of entitlement; there are others more deserving.
-God expects me to operate on his behalf
-He’s entrusting me to be a witness 24/7
-Privileges that are given is because God trusts me & the picture is bigger than me
-Always be a drum major for truth by demonstrating the right priorities (Galatians 6)
-Display right practices
-My goal should be to do whatever it takes to win one for Christ – as Paul mentions
-Live in such a way that I inspire someone else to come to Christ
-My life should not be about me but should be about other people.
-There is someone watching my footsteps. Am I living in such a way that someone would want to follow my footsteps? (1979 blizzard… son follow footsteps of dad home)
2. Take time to develop character (v23)
-Never assume that I'm going to grow old
-Don't live life with regrets
-Life is important, individual, and intense
-Give life and God my best… don’t miss any opportunities by worrying about who’s running against me
-The race is not given to the swift or strong but to the one that endures to the end
-Life is intense (v25)
-Great opportunities have been afforded to some, but not everyone can the handle spotlight because they lack integrity
3. Take time to develop consistency
-Life requires development
-Strive to be intentional in everything that I do.
-Do not go through life aiming without a target
15 August 2009
Race: Part I
If you have been watching the news lately, recall the recent headlines: Harvard professor played the race card; any good neighbor would call police, PETA remains skeptical of [Michael] Vick; considers protests at games, Is race driving the anger at these town hall meetings, and Georgia Office of Rep. Scott Defaced by Swastika. These headlines all indicate that America has her hands full with constructing better race relations in America.
In the later part of July, the Professor Gates' arrest was going away. In the middle of a press conference, on health care reform, a reporter interjected by asking President Obama’s opinion of the arrest. President Obama clearly misspoke by calling Officer Crowley’s actions as being “stupidly.” He later apologized. But Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck would not let the situation run its course.
In an interview with Greta Van Susteren, of Fox News’, Limbaugh mentioned: “We’re finding out that this guy’s got a chip on his shoulder. He’s angry at this country. He’s not proud of it… I think there are elements in this country he doesn’t like and he never has liked.” While Limbaugh and his conservative friends are entitled to their opinions of our president, I strongly refute Limbaugh’s remarks. Since February of 2007, and earlier, some conservatives have tried painting President Obama as someone who is out of touch with the founding fathers’ ideologies, as being un-American and have been on a mission to distort his presidency. While it is normal, and rather political, for the opposing party to counter each other’s agenda, it is also extremely disturbing for blatant lies to surface in hopes of twisting the truth. Limbaugh did not stop. He went on to say: “He's using the power of the presidency to remake the country.” Way to go Limbaugh! Each presidential candidate, in one fashion or the other, campaigns on reshaping the country.
In an interview, on Fox News’, Beck said, “[President Obama is] a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture... I'm not saying he doesn't like white people, I'm saying he has a problem... This guy is, I believe, a racist.” Remarks such as this further divide our country. This infuses racial separations and makes it harder for us to create a nation where the color of our skin does not epitomize who we are as individuals. For an extended period of time, civil rights icons fought in hopes of establishing a country that does not judge the other based on their race. Since the election of the country’s first black president, the dialogue on race has resurfaced. I welcome this. We have so many people who are passionate about uncovering the deeply engrained, stereotypes and critical analysis of the black race. To an individual, there is much more than what you can visualize externally. As a nation that is full of people from all walks of life, with different backgrounds, different life stories and of all race – we have to get to a point where we can embrace people for who they are and accept them as is.
In the later part of July, the Professor Gates' arrest was going away. In the middle of a press conference, on health care reform, a reporter interjected by asking President Obama’s opinion of the arrest. President Obama clearly misspoke by calling Officer Crowley’s actions as being “stupidly.” He later apologized. But Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck would not let the situation run its course.
In an interview with Greta Van Susteren, of Fox News’, Limbaugh mentioned: “We’re finding out that this guy’s got a chip on his shoulder. He’s angry at this country. He’s not proud of it… I think there are elements in this country he doesn’t like and he never has liked.” While Limbaugh and his conservative friends are entitled to their opinions of our president, I strongly refute Limbaugh’s remarks. Since February of 2007, and earlier, some conservatives have tried painting President Obama as someone who is out of touch with the founding fathers’ ideologies, as being un-American and have been on a mission to distort his presidency. While it is normal, and rather political, for the opposing party to counter each other’s agenda, it is also extremely disturbing for blatant lies to surface in hopes of twisting the truth. Limbaugh did not stop. He went on to say: “He's using the power of the presidency to remake the country.” Way to go Limbaugh! Each presidential candidate, in one fashion or the other, campaigns on reshaping the country.
In an interview, on Fox News’, Beck said, “[President Obama is] a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture... I'm not saying he doesn't like white people, I'm saying he has a problem... This guy is, I believe, a racist.” Remarks such as this further divide our country. This infuses racial separations and makes it harder for us to create a nation where the color of our skin does not epitomize who we are as individuals. For an extended period of time, civil rights icons fought in hopes of establishing a country that does not judge the other based on their race. Since the election of the country’s first black president, the dialogue on race has resurfaced. I welcome this. We have so many people who are passionate about uncovering the deeply engrained, stereotypes and critical analysis of the black race. To an individual, there is much more than what you can visualize externally. As a nation that is full of people from all walks of life, with different backgrounds, different life stories and of all race – we have to get to a point where we can embrace people for who they are and accept them as is.
Have you said "I love you" lately?
This morning, I woke up to an inspirational text message from my mom. It truly came from her heart. All she said was, "I am proud of you. Love you." The baby inside of me is tearing. Ah, I can make it through the weekend. Love you, moms!
10 August 2009
2007: State of the Black Union
One of my students sent this to me. I don't have time to comment right now, will do so later. Nonetheless, Dr. Julia Hare is very hilarious.
Ebay & General Motors
Are you looking to buy a vehicle? Then look no further than eBay. General Motors will begin selling cars tomorrow on the popular online auction site. This will be the real deal. The only catch is: you have to live in California. That sucks! According to Business Journal, “consumers will be able to browse showrooms, ask questions, negotiate prices and purchase new 2008-2010 vehicles”. Recently out of bankruptcy, GM is taking advantage of the market niche. A report titled, “Consumer Behavior Online: A 2009 Deep Dive” released by Forrester indicates that on average, consumers spend at least 12 hours a week online. This indicates that more people are less skeptical to goods online. For example, last month, instead of going into Best Buy or Circuit City to buy another laptop power surge for a hundred bucks, I went to the popular Froogle.com, and saved myself roughly $80. I ordered the surge online on Wednesday and it arrived by Friday. The power of the net!
06 August 2009
Twitter & Facebook Problems
Okay. I am having withdrawals. Before eating breakfast, feeding the dog or preparing for work in the morning, I have grown accustomed to regularly updating my Twitter. For some reason, twitter.com is not responding. I have even tried to update my 140-character status message using the Twitta service from my TMobile G1. Nothing is happening.
The way the world communicates has changed. Talking on the phone has become antiquated and has been replaced by text messaging. Although I’m not a regular user of Facebook, one of my friend text me and said she was having problems logging into the system. System administrators: We are not going to be able to survive the day without having access to our popular social networking sites. Please fix this fast! These withdrawal pains are not easy.
The way the world communicates has changed. Talking on the phone has become antiquated and has been replaced by text messaging. Although I’m not a regular user of Facebook, one of my friend text me and said she was having problems logging into the system. System administrators: We are not going to be able to survive the day without having access to our popular social networking sites. Please fix this fast! These withdrawal pains are not easy.
02 August 2009
Sunday's Song
I need just 10 minutes of your time. Please take a look at this video in its entirety.
01 August 2009
Civil Rights Movement = 2 Gay Rights Movement?
Last night, one of my good friends, and I had an extremely long discussion about whether it would be appropriate to equate the gay rights movement to the civil rights movement. In both movements, each party is (or was) fighting for the right to equality, and both parties have people who oppose their right to live free from discrimination. Ultimately, the two classes have different fights, but their bottom line goal was (and still is) to convince their counterparts that they have the right to be treated fairly. Gay people are attempting to convince some heterosexuals, while blacks convinced some whites that their being discriminated against was unfounded and unfair.
My friend, who I will refer to as “John”, believed that the civil rights movement was extremely different, in context – which I agree. Our disagreement stemmed from whether the movements were the same sort of lobbying. I presented several analogies. One of the basic: if I’m told to dig a hole in Atlanta, and you’re told to dig a hole in Dallas – no matter where we’re digging holes at, at the end of the day – we both dug holes. John believed that black people were discriminated based on what a person could see – the color of their skin. And he is absolutely correct. Gay people are discriminated based on their sexual preference, whether you can immediately recognize a gay person would be based on a case by case analysis; however, each group is being discriminated against.
I was really taken back by how he could not see that they were both fighting for different rights, but yet both fighting for rights. Because of the extremely sensitive content, race and sexual preferences, our conversation quickly turned from whether they were both “equal rights” to whether gays should even have rights at all. Again, we differed. Our entire discussion began with a marquee from a church in Texas that read: “Gays right are not civil rights”. And I wholeheartedly disagree with this pastor’s opinion and personal assessment. This pastor can morally choose to disagree with a gay person’s lifestyle; however, it becomes extremely absurd when he beings to advocate denying certain people the right to equality. Neither should he use the pulpit as a punching bag to seclude a particular group of people. Being rooted and grounded in one’s personal beliefs does not exempt one from treating people fairly or cautious of their feelings.
John believed that gays should refrain from causing uproar because being gay is a preference, whereas being black is not an option. On the contrary, I expressed that individual classes should be able to live without lawmakers setting parameters within their freedom to choose. Whether one falls within the pool of diversity of being physically disabled, male or female, rich or poor, young or old, white or black – we as people should have the liberty of expressing ourselves as unique and different individuals. After all, this is what makes us the great melting pot of groups, ideas and citizenships.
By surrounding myself with people who come from different backgrounds than me, with those who have ideas that does not always align with mine has taught me that at the end of the day, we have something in common – we just want to be happy and free of worries. Because we sit in different sections of the aisle does not mean we cannot find that uniting bond that holds us together. While my atheist friend is guided by his personal convictions and my Muslim friend’s lifestyle are shaped through her ideologies, we are able to create civil discourse and merge our differences and ultimately realize that we are one.
My friend, who I will refer to as “John”, believed that the civil rights movement was extremely different, in context – which I agree. Our disagreement stemmed from whether the movements were the same sort of lobbying. I presented several analogies. One of the basic: if I’m told to dig a hole in Atlanta, and you’re told to dig a hole in Dallas – no matter where we’re digging holes at, at the end of the day – we both dug holes. John believed that black people were discriminated based on what a person could see – the color of their skin. And he is absolutely correct. Gay people are discriminated based on their sexual preference, whether you can immediately recognize a gay person would be based on a case by case analysis; however, each group is being discriminated against.
I was really taken back by how he could not see that they were both fighting for different rights, but yet both fighting for rights. Because of the extremely sensitive content, race and sexual preferences, our conversation quickly turned from whether they were both “equal rights” to whether gays should even have rights at all. Again, we differed. Our entire discussion began with a marquee from a church in Texas that read: “Gays right are not civil rights”. And I wholeheartedly disagree with this pastor’s opinion and personal assessment. This pastor can morally choose to disagree with a gay person’s lifestyle; however, it becomes extremely absurd when he beings to advocate denying certain people the right to equality. Neither should he use the pulpit as a punching bag to seclude a particular group of people. Being rooted and grounded in one’s personal beliefs does not exempt one from treating people fairly or cautious of their feelings.
John believed that gays should refrain from causing uproar because being gay is a preference, whereas being black is not an option. On the contrary, I expressed that individual classes should be able to live without lawmakers setting parameters within their freedom to choose. Whether one falls within the pool of diversity of being physically disabled, male or female, rich or poor, young or old, white or black – we as people should have the liberty of expressing ourselves as unique and different individuals. After all, this is what makes us the great melting pot of groups, ideas and citizenships.
By surrounding myself with people who come from different backgrounds than me, with those who have ideas that does not always align with mine has taught me that at the end of the day, we have something in common – we just want to be happy and free of worries. Because we sit in different sections of the aisle does not mean we cannot find that uniting bond that holds us together. While my atheist friend is guided by his personal convictions and my Muslim friend’s lifestyle are shaped through her ideologies, we are able to create civil discourse and merge our differences and ultimately realize that we are one.
30 July 2009
Embracing a reemerging icon: Whitney Houston
Everyone has family members who have acted out in ways that would cause some members of the family to be downright embarrassed and humiliated. Being careful of passing judgment, these are the ones who relentlessly seek attention, constantly have problems after the next or just simply make those “what could you have been possibly thinking about”-type decisions. In some instances, their choices could potentially tarnish the upstanding legacy of the family. What I admire about my race is that we often have a heart of extending redemptive love to those who need it most. Instead of shunning our family members or speaking ill, we politely express our sentiments of unhappiness with their actions and encourage them to rectify their behavior. Some members exude tough love. Others stand in the background offering cheers of how to rise above their painful situation.
We all are aware of Whitney Houston’s past. At a very young age, she rose to stardom because of her singing abilities. She captured the attention of millions of fans worldwide through her crossover appeal, and she was offered several lead roles in films – becoming an amazing actress. However, she later faced public scrutiny because of her admitted drug use and failed marriage. You may recall back in 2005 when she made regular appearances on Being Bobby Brown; the show epitomized the obvious –Houston was being hit hard with the vicissitudes of life.
Houston does not ride solo in public exile. Others such as: Chris Brown, former NAACP Youth and College Director turned Baltimore preacher Rev. Jamal-Harrison Bryant, Michael Vick (among a host of other athletes – Ron Artest, OJ Simpson) and R. Kelly have all had to endure such unrestricted opinion.
Listening to Vivica Fox on the Wendy Williams Show last week when she spoke of the Chris Brown apology inspired me to write this entry. She said that “[Chris] has a tremendous amount of talent and a bright future. He made a mistake… when I see him I will embrace him and give him a hug”.
Bishop Jakes wrote in a press release regarding his son, Jermaine, that “in spite of the family pain we feel from this unfortunate situation, it has given us a chance to show him the same help, support, and restorative grace for which our family and church is noted.”
One of the biggest conduits for championing those who have fallen has been my Big Ma. She instilled in me that that while I might not agree with someone’s behavior or past mistakes, to always “be careful for nothing”. Perhaps my struggles are not public. Truthfully speak, I too have found myself on the dark Damascus Road and needed someone to embrace and love me. Therefore, I have to firmly support Whitney, the legend. I truly believe that her best days are ahead of her!
We all are aware of Whitney Houston’s past. At a very young age, she rose to stardom because of her singing abilities. She captured the attention of millions of fans worldwide through her crossover appeal, and she was offered several lead roles in films – becoming an amazing actress. However, she later faced public scrutiny because of her admitted drug use and failed marriage. You may recall back in 2005 when she made regular appearances on Being Bobby Brown; the show epitomized the obvious –Houston was being hit hard with the vicissitudes of life.
Houston does not ride solo in public exile. Others such as: Chris Brown, former NAACP Youth and College Director turned Baltimore preacher Rev. Jamal-Harrison Bryant, Michael Vick (among a host of other athletes – Ron Artest, OJ Simpson) and R. Kelly have all had to endure such unrestricted opinion.
Listening to Vivica Fox on the Wendy Williams Show last week when she spoke of the Chris Brown apology inspired me to write this entry. She said that “[Chris] has a tremendous amount of talent and a bright future. He made a mistake… when I see him I will embrace him and give him a hug”.
Bishop Jakes wrote in a press release regarding his son, Jermaine, that “in spite of the family pain we feel from this unfortunate situation, it has given us a chance to show him the same help, support, and restorative grace for which our family and church is noted.”
One of the biggest conduits for championing those who have fallen has been my Big Ma. She instilled in me that that while I might not agree with someone’s behavior or past mistakes, to always “be careful for nothing”. Perhaps my struggles are not public. Truthfully speak, I too have found myself on the dark Damascus Road and needed someone to embrace and love me. Therefore, I have to firmly support Whitney, the legend. I truly believe that her best days are ahead of her!
I L o o k t o Y o u
1. Million Dollar Bill
2. Nothin' But Love
3. Call You Tonight
4. I Look To You
5. Like I Never Left (feat. Akon)
6. A Song For You
7. I Didn't Know My Own Strength
8. Worth It
9. For The Lovers
10. I Got You
11. Salute
25 July 2009
Blog Name Change: The Barber's Chair (TBC)
Taking the summer months off from blogging has been extremely relaxing.
During this two month sabbatical, I have been able to gather new thoughts, enjoy a few new reads, and also assess the reason why I enjoy blogging so much. By this time, you may have noticed that the name of the blog has changed to "The Barber's Chair". Changing the name was easy. Sitting at the barbershop one day, I recalled a conversation with my grandfather before he passed. He mentioned that the barbershop, back in his day, was the primary outlet for black men (especially) to engage in open conversations without fear of being restrained by their counterparts. When black men felt isolated and their voices where not heard, they used the barbershop as an avenue to uplift each other. This was regarded as their “community”. And to date, the black barbershop remains the same.
Going into a black-owned barbershop at any given moment (except Mondays – when most are closed), you very well might witness barbers acting as unscripted facilitators while many patrons provide feedback on the many topics of the hour. Perhaps the conversation may have changed from earlier times in history, the ultimate outlet remains unbroken.
Further, the black barbershop often gives men a sense of culture. This is one place where black men are able to express their likes and disgruntles in a free environment. Often, you might see someone coming in the shop rendering their services, asking to post a business card or selling a bootleg. This is embraced and very much encouraged.
So I extend this invitation for you to gather around the barber’s chair (TBC), and engage in meaningful conversation!
I'm back!
During this two month sabbatical, I have been able to gather new thoughts, enjoy a few new reads, and also assess the reason why I enjoy blogging so much. By this time, you may have noticed that the name of the blog has changed to "The Barber's Chair". Changing the name was easy. Sitting at the barbershop one day, I recalled a conversation with my grandfather before he passed. He mentioned that the barbershop, back in his day, was the primary outlet for black men (especially) to engage in open conversations without fear of being restrained by their counterparts. When black men felt isolated and their voices where not heard, they used the barbershop as an avenue to uplift each other. This was regarded as their “community”. And to date, the black barbershop remains the same.
Going into a black-owned barbershop at any given moment (except Mondays – when most are closed), you very well might witness barbers acting as unscripted facilitators while many patrons provide feedback on the many topics of the hour. Perhaps the conversation may have changed from earlier times in history, the ultimate outlet remains unbroken.
Further, the black barbershop often gives men a sense of culture. This is one place where black men are able to express their likes and disgruntles in a free environment. Often, you might see someone coming in the shop rendering their services, asking to post a business card or selling a bootleg. This is embraced and very much encouraged.
So I extend this invitation for you to gather around the barber’s chair (TBC), and engage in meaningful conversation!
I'm back!
28 May 2009
Sexy Spec & Pretty Ricky
I need not receive more texts asking if I've seen the Sexy Spec & Pretty Ricky video. I'm not sure what all the hype is all about. It's just a male performer dancing with clothes. I don't get it. Here goes:
27 May 2009
From the Projects to the Supreme Court
President Obama nominated Sonia Sotomayor to the nation’s highest court on yesterday. If elected, she will become the first Latina and third woman to serve on the Supreme Court.
Her academic success and law records were enough reasons alone for her to be selected. In his revealing speech, Obama credited her background and her amazing story from the Bronx projects, to becoming a judge as highlights of her accomplishments.
Sotomayor, raised in the housing project, graduated from Princeton University and Yale Law School. She is a competent and smart judge - who inspires all, just like President Obama to "not despise the days of small beginnings".
Some are already labeling her a racist. However, she simply stated that because of her race, she has had different experiences than her counterparts. As a result, she would be able to have a broader picture of people from all walks of life (i.e. from people who lives in the projects to those who are stockbrokers and lawmakers) when making decisions from the bench. She may have poorly selected her words - perhaps she could have said "because of my humble experiences…” – nonetheless let’s get her confirmed. She's the business.
26 May 2009
25 May 2009
Do you watch Cheaters?
This episode of Cheaters is hilarious. She chases him in the restroom and beats him with her shoe. Relationships will make you do some crazy things!
Education in America
Strong American Schools released some startling facts about our public school system. Did you know that –
- 1.2 million students drop out of high school every year
- ¼ of high school students do not graduate on time
- 70% of 8th graders can’t read at grade level
- 2/3 of jobs require a college education
- The majority of employers and college professors say today’s high school graduates do not have the skills to succeed. The majority of high school graduates say they regret not learning more in high school.
Source: www.strongamericanschools.org
Memorial Day Gratitude
Thank you to all the soldiers that have fought and continue to fight for our freedom on a daily basis. These women and men make it easier for us to live in a safe America.
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